My Utmost - Oct 12, 2009

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Getting Into God's Stride

Genesis 5:24
“Enoch walked with God.”

Key Passages

• The test of a man's religious life and character is not what he does in the exceptional moments of life, but what he does in the ordinary times, when there is nothing tremendous or exciting on.

• The worth of a man is revealed in his attitude to ordinary things when he is not before the footlights.

• It is difficult to get into stride with God, because when we start walking with Him we find He has outstripped us before we have taken three steps.

• It was said of Jesus, “He shall not fail nor be discouraged”, because He never worked from His own individual standpoint but always from the standpoint of His Father, and we have to learn to do the same.

• God's Spirit alters the atmosphere of our way of looking at things, and things begin to be possible which never were possible before.

• Getting into stride with God means nothing less than union with Himself.

• It takes a long time to get there, but keep at it. Don't give in because the pain is bad just now, get on with it, and before long you will find you have a new vision and a new purpose.

My Own Thoughts

Dear Father, I want to be on stride with you. You've outstripped me by more than 3 steps thats for sure. I want that new vision and new purpose Lord. Make me into the person you want me to be whether it be in the ordinary times or the exceptional times.

My Utmost - Oct 7, 2009

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Reconciliation

2 Corinthians 5:21
“For He hath made Him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in Him.”

Key Passages

• Sin is a fundamental relationship; it is not wrong doing, it is wrong being, deliberate and emphatic independence of God.

• Other religions deal with sins; the Bible alone deals with sin.

• The first thing Jesus Christ faced in men was the heredity of sin, and it is because we have ignored this in our presentation of the Gospel that the message of the Gospel has lost its sting and its blasting power.

• The revelation of the Bible is not that Jesus Christ took upon Himself our fleshly sins, but that He took upon Himself the heredity of sin which no man can touch.

• … Our Lord bore the sin of the world by identification, not by sympathy.

• He deliberately took upon His own shoulders, and bore in His own Person, the whole massed sin of the human race...

• A distinction must always be made between the revelation of Redemption and the conscious experience of salvation in a man's life.

My Own Thoughts

This is hard to comprehend, truthfully. The very fact that Christ took on sin, in total, and bore it in His own body. All of the darkness and the complete saturation of every single act of ill will was placed upon His shoulders. From the seemingly most insignificant and sometimes nurtured thought of harm to another person that we sometimes play off as harmless because its just in our heads... to the complete destruction and genocide of a people group. From a quick second glance at an attractive young female to child molestation and sexual slavery. Every form of minor act of sin such as a white lie right down to the darkest and most complete forms of human depravity and brokenness. Christ took the full impact of that within Himself and bore it so that the human race could be made right with God. I find it hard to comprehend. It's not just that He died for us, He did it while feeling the full impact of the judgement of God on sin, and He walked into it knowingly. He knew what was going to happen, and He did it anyway. Simply because He loved us. Could I bare the darkness that Hitler created? That's just one man who was made very public. What about all the complete atrocities that happen all the time in the world that go unnoticed simply because no one is there to hear the voices of the victims. It is amazing to me that God would have anything to do with us.

The real trick for me is to realize that I am no better than Hitler. If a thought is as bad as the deed, then I am right up there with the worst of the worst. I don't think God gets into sin counting though. It's the complete condition that He came to fix, not the individual acts.

Now, the only thing I or anyone else has to do, is to believe that. Difficult to comprehend as it may be that someone could do that.... I believe it. I have to believe it because its the only hope I see for a world that suffers from a debilitating condition of brokenness.

My Utmost - Oct 6, 2009

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The Bent Of Regeneration

Galations 1:15-16
“When it pleased God... to reveal His Son in me.”

Key Passages

• If Jesus is to regenerate me, what is the problem He is up against?

• I have a heredity I had no say in; I am not holy, nor likely to be; and if all Jesus Christ can do is to tell me I must be holy, His teaching plants despair.

• But if Jesus Christ is a Regenerator, One Who can put into me His own heredity of holiness, then I begin to see what He is driving at when He says that I have to be holy.

• The New Testament teaching about regeneration is that when a man is struck by a sense of need, God will put the Holy Spirit into his spirit, and his personal spirit will be energized by the Spirit of the Son of God, “until Christ be formed in you.”

• When I reach the frontier of need and know my limitations, Jesus says - “Blessed are you.”

My Own Thoughts

That first question is the key for me right now. I am trying to figure out what it is in me that is holding Jesus back from being able to completely regenerate me. More and more I find it to be a sense of selfishness that has sprung up in me. I have grown accustomed to getting things my way when I want them, and if I don't get what I want I complain about it until I do. I am good at that. I have a sense of entitlement that I am having trouble shaking. A sense of entitlement to myself, my time, my own desires. I want to do what I want to do. What I am being shown increasingly by the Holy Spirit is that I am not my own, but I belong to Him for His purposes. I need to get out of the way and let go of all I am holding onto. Much easier said than done.

Dear Heavenly Father, I praise you for your gentle Spirit pointing out where you need to me to let go. I praise you for the fact that you created me and know me better than I can even know myself. I pray that your will would be done in my life Lord, as you want it done. Help me to let go of myself and to let go of this sense of entitlement. Forgive me for my selfishness Lord. I confess it to you now.

My Utmost - Oct 5, 2009

I missed a few days I know... it was busy weekend alright. Lay off...

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The Bias Of Degeneration

Romans 5:12
“Wherefore as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned.”

Key Passages

• The disposition of sin is not immorality and wrong-doing, but the disposition of self-realization – I am my own god.

• When our Lord faced men with all the forces of evil in them, and men who were clean living and moral and upright, He did not pay any attention to the moral degradation of the one or to the moral attainment of the other; He looked at something we do not see, viz., the disposition.

• The condemnation is not that I am born with a heredity of sin, but if when I realize Jesus Christ came to deliver me from it, I refuse to let Him do so, from that moment I begin to get the seal of damnation.

My Own Thoughts

When I read this passage I think of the woman at the well and the pharisees. The woman when confronted with all she had done wrong was open to being confronted with her wrong and she loved Jesus for showing it to her. She accepted his light being shined into her darkness. The pharisees however, when confronted with their brokenness and darkness did not accept Jesus' light being shined into it. They refused it because they didn't think they needed that. They were their own light. They were their own gods. They needed no God, even one they claimed to follow.

So the next question is which group do I belong to. Am I of the family of the woman at the well, or do I belong with the pharisees?

God I pray you'd give me the heart of the woman at the well, who ached for you to come and shine your light into her darkness. She longed for the revelation of your light in her life. She needed it and clung to it when it came. I want her heart Lord. I want to be broken so that I can be used by you Lord.

My Utmost - Oct 2, 2009

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The Sphere Of Humiliation

Mark 9:22
“If Thou canst do anything, have compassion on us, and help us.”

Key Passages

• After every time of exultation we are brought down with a sudden rush into things as they are where it is neither beautiful nor poetic nor thrilling.

• The height of the mountain top is measured by the drab drudgery of the valley; but it is in the valley that we have to live for the glory of God.

• We see His glory on the mount, but we live for His glory there.

• When you were on the mount you could believe anything, but what about that time when you were up against facts in the valley?

My Own Thoughts

I love these readings because they seem to catch me right where I am at. No phrase could sum up my life and this reading better than that third key passage. “We see His glory on the mount, but we live His glory there (in the valley).” Those mountain top moments are great because they captivate us to who God really is and to His amazing power. If all we ever received were the mountain top moments how could we ever be brought to a choice about trusting God or not. He wants us to trust Him and be drawn to Him at all times, not just when its made easy for us. I am right in that valley right now. It seems I am shown more and more each day just how selfishness and self-seeking I am lately. I am really struggling with this sin. It is the one sin that permeates my entire being and leads to all other sins.

Dear Lord and Heavenly Father, you are amazing and I thank you for giving me mountain top moments where I am quite nearly forced to believe in you. I thank you also for the dark moments in the drab valley where I must believe you to survive. I thank for those moments because they make you more real than even the mountain top moments. Forgive me for my selfishness Lord. I have sought only myself and my own comfort. Open my eyes to the needs of those around me. Help me to live in your Kingdom God.

Poetry... It Could Suck, But What Do I Care...

Rummaging around on my computer and straightening up file folders and what not, I ran across these old bits of poetry that I wrote long, long ago. They could really suck, but oh well. Just thought I would share them for the fun of it. Enjoy...

This Love
--------------------
Decisions are made each new day
some weigh heavier than others
but none sit so heavy
as the decisions we make on who to love
to genuinely love someone
despite their flaws
leaves us more vulnerable and dangerous
than any other time in our lives
love is a dangerous business
on either side of the spectrum
leave yourself open to attack
or crush someone with a word
but I wouldn't have it any other way
because love is more than dangerous
its alive and vibrant and active
and it can save the very soul of a man

much like this love has done for me
exactly as this love has done in me

to be accepted completely
despite the faults I contain
and my problematic temperament
is all that I can ask of no one
but I didn't have to ask of you
there was no working towards your acceptance
no attempts to get in your good graces
you look at me as lost and scattered
looking for the shepherd,
trying to be my own
trying to get back to no-mans land
trying to get back home

much like this love can do for me
exactly as this love has done in me


Time Spent
--------------------
time spent is time fast
and with you it moves quicker
enough can not grant

Marriage
--------------------
sometimes life gets the best of us
and other times we get the best of each other
sometimes we can't get enough
and other times we take too much


Stronghold
--------------------
You are a light on a hill unblemished
before a valley of darkness spreading
never yielding in beauty untarnished
or strength unmatched until time unending
you are my song and thy glory I praise
wild hearted savior, which can't be tamed
brilliant and terrible, shines thy face
both piercing the heart, and raising the shamed
mighty rock on which I will place my feet
the arms that hold me fast despite my fears
the mercy of which my sins match will meet
with thy wounded hand, wipe away my tears
freedom and life as meant to have been told
this is my hearts cry, you are my stronghold

My Utmost - Oct 1, 2009

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The Sphere Of Exultation

Mark 9:2
“Jesus leadeth them up into a high mountain apart by themselves.”

Key Passages

• We have all had times on the mount, when we have seen things from God's standpoint and have wanted to stay there; but God will never allow us to stay there.

• The test of our spiritual life is the power to descend; if we have power to rise only, something is wrong.

• It is a great thing to be on the mount with God, but a man only gets there in order that afterwards he may get down among the devil-possessed and lift them up.

• We are not built for the mountains and the dawns and aesthetic affinities, those are for moments of inspiration, that is all.

• We are built for the valley...

• Spiritual selfishness always wants repeated moments on the mount.

• The mount is not meant to teach us anything, it is meant to make us something.

• The moments on the mountain tops are rare moments, and they are meant for something in God's purpose.

My Own Thoughts

I guess I should have just copied the whole reading for today into my key passages section. This reading was great I thought, and really seemed to hit me hard. For quite a while it has seemed as though those mountain top moments were really the only thing keeping me going. I'd get one and be able to survive my daily life for a while, and right when it begins to feel like I am not going to make it God lifts me up and gives me one more of those moments. Those glimpses into who He is and what He is doing.

I've had a really hard time admittedly living in the “demon-possessed” valley for quite some time now. I don't feel like I am lifting anyone up. I think I am spiritually selfish. I've been looking to see what I can get from following God. Not what I can give to others to show them how much God loves them. I think a lot of us do this. We get so wrapped up in finding our own peace, safety, salvation, etc,... that we forget to look after others who need God in their lives. Jesus didn't come here preaching a gospel of self help, and he didn't come here preaching sermons on how to feel good about yourself. He came here and taught on what it means to live in the Kingdom Of God. Living in the Kingdom Of God couldn't be more opposite from living in the kingdom of Rick. Living in the Kingdom Of God involves righting the wrongs that we see day in and day out in the lives of those we come in contact with, and even in the lives of those we don't necessarily coming in contact with. It's not about trying to find peace & comfort, or health & wealth in our own lives. It's about trying to bring those things to those around us, and trusting that someday we may find that God has given us that in return. To live in the Kingdom Of God is to bring it to those in the demon-possessed valley.

Dear Father in Heaven, I praise you Father for being a God who cares about the least of these, and wants us all to live in your Kingdom. I pray that your Kingdom would come down, and that you would use me as a vessel and messenger of that Kingdom. Give me what I need to fulfill this purpose Lord, and only you know fully what it is that I need so I leave that in your hands. Forgive me for living for myself and showing no concern for those I come in contact with. Lead me out of the temptation to follow my own desires and my own heart. Give me the ability to follow your heart for others. This is your world and your kingdom Lord, and all the glory and renown belong to you Lord.